Summer Thoughts

It is officially considered “summer” in the United States, and this morning where I live we had the first thunderstorm of the year. We have had some rain until now, but usually only about five minutes worth, and not accompanied by thunder. This morning there was thunder.

School is currently out, but soon I will begin planning for the next school year for my third grader. In our family, we are also experiencing another transition that may or may not bring for a rocky school year for us.

In this time between school years, and planning for the upcoming school year, I have been trying to work on as much music as possible. Setting up tracks for mixing, some for songwriting and then mixing, and creating new tracks that will be built on further in the future.

The mornings for me are spent sipping coffee, scrolling social media and interacting with others, and then I am at the computer for an hour or two working on the next song to release. I am currently in the lyric writing stage for a song that I built a foundation for last year.

In the United States, California specifically, people are beginning to act like Covid-19 is over. I don’t know that it is, it doesn’t seem like it is to me, and so I am either suffering from agoraphobia, paranoia, or my intuition is telling me not to behave the way others are.

Since I am of the mind to trust my intuition over politicians and CEOs just trying to get Americans back to work so they can fill their pockets while we pay their taxes; I am continuing to stay home.

We get out some, but we aren’t acting like Covid was never a thing. The child is too young for vaccination, so I would be stupid to be behaving as if everything is just fine. I don’t care what others think of that as it is absolutely none of anyone else’s business what my family and I do.

Nothing feels normal to me. I don’t want to return to a normal that was never a good fit for me in the first place. My whole life I have heard, “why can’t you just be normal”, from people who don’t even know who they are in the first place. I don’t want to be like that. I don’t want to be normal.

Normal in the United States must be pretending like an incredibly communicable virus didn’t just ravage through our major cities. Like most of us didn’t lose at least one person to Covid.

No thank you. I won’t be returning to normal.

The problem I am facing, though, is finding legit work I can do from home that isn’t a full time job. This blog isn’t making me money at the moment; music is making pennies; and I am beginning to need small things for music that begin to add up. Not to mention, of course, bills to pay.

I wish more jobs were created for parents like me who also want to homeschool our children, with or without the help of an educational institution. The most I can find are sites where I sit and do surveys, but I’d prefer something where I can type.

I don’t know where this blog is going to go. I wanted it to help me build my brand, and help me sell my art, and share my creativity, and make me money. But the internet is far too saturated, I am far too uninteresting, and I have far too tight of a budget to get actual traffic here.

Of course, I appreciate those who do actually read my posts, but from the numbers, the last few months my posts have not had real traffic.

I intend on pushing forward and finding what works after an upcoming transition in my life. For now, I guess I am filling out surveys for dollars, and hoping my crypto investments aren’t a total loss. I’ve only invested what I can lose, I am simply hoping that isn’t the case.

So cheers to Summertime.

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